Parts one and two of this series discussed thee importance of nutrition.
     Part three discussed further beneficial findings.
     Part four discussed the dangers of aspartame and other artificial sweeteners.
   
     In part five, remaining areas of concern.

      Chemicals, whether on food, in food, in medications, in my environment or home, tend to be of significant aggravation to me.  Avoidance of all these "extras" is the best plan.

      Unfortunately, it's practically impossible to avoid all chemicals, but the choice to make a conscious effort is the first step.

       A topic that is rather controversial, but one which must be thoroughly investigated by a third party with no interest (financial or other),  is the area of vaccines.  I am by no means an "anti vaxxer" and do realize, many have practically wiped out various, diseases.  Polio comes to mind here, but there are others.

      I do find it a tad suspicious though, if they're all so good with no issues or concerns, why vaccine companies do not want any further testing etc.  It seems to me, if I KNEW something to be true and right, I would not be concerned with anyone testing and deciding for themselves.  

     As anyone with these illnesses (CFS, Fibro etc.) know, we have a very low threshold to, well, just about everything.   Every day things that don't bother healthy folks, cause debilitating reactions with us.  Things like, light, sound, foods, chemicals, temperature....can bring us crashing down.  You can imagine then, how much more so for things we put into our bodies. I for one, would really like to know the truth about what is in them and what, if anything, they will do to my body and my condition.  

      The fact vaccine companies et al are so against further, non biased investigations is a huge red flag for me.  If everything is ok, then what is their concern?

     Finally though, there is an investigative documentary into this very topic.  It investigates all angles of vaccines and is made in consultation with many doctors and experts in this area.  

      This documentary entitled (this is an affiliate link) "The Truth About Vaccines" will  be released April 12, 2017 -- the waiting is so hard!  

     Until then, you can catch a FREE trailer of the documentary, here .

     We all need to be informed so we can make the best choices for our family.

      Staying informed, so we can keep 

                        Balance....despite the Chaos!          
      

                I was going to entitle this post "The Dangers of Aspartame" but changed it to include all artificial sweeteners.  I know aspartame is classified as safe under the FDA, but truly there have been so many things over the years labelled safe initially, only to be found extremely dangerous down the road. Thalidomide and asbestos come to mind but there are many, many more.        

      As I mentioned in a previous post, I used to use aspartame in my coffee. As well, whenever I could, I opted for the "sugar free" variety of everything. After all, reducing sugar was the goal and aspartame was "safe" so it was a win win situation. Right?  

     Wrong.  

      I wish I knew then what I know now, without having had to learn it first- hand at the expense of my health.  Very expensive lesson (and I'm not talking expensive as in monetary value here).

   My own personal experience using this FDA "approved" substance together with the many other "approved-today-oops-dangerous-after-all-tomorrow" things, have left me extremely skeptical, especially of all sweeteners. I hear sweetener "A" has been tested and is safe or Sweetener XYZ is a natural substance and therefore safe and my radar goes off.  To me, it's just not worth the risk of consuming it only to find out later on it's caused me another health issue.     There are so many "things" in our foods these days, sometimes lurking under another, unrecognizable name, that I try to eat a whole foods only diet (well as whole as one can get these days).
​  
    When I started to look further into the whole aspartame thing,  I was shocked at the sheer number of products we consume which contain aspartame or other artificial sweetener. 

   Items like (but not limited to):

•  diet soda
•  flavoured waters
•  drink powders
• anything marked "sugar-free" It has to get its sweetness from somewhere and if it isn't from sugar, it's more often than not, something artificial.  
• sugar-free candies
• chewable vitamins (children's vitamins!)
• chewing gum (sugar free)
• some over-the-counter medicines (like cough drops, cough syrups)
• some prescription medicines (I was shocked to see my husband's migraine medication contained it, especially when headaches are a known side-effect of aspartame)
• frozen desserts
• some yogurt 
• some puddings
• some condiments and sauces

    
     The list goes of products goes on and on (One list indicated it's in as many as SIX THOUSAND different products!).  The take away thought here is, we MUST become label readers.  Better yet, buying things that don't require a label are even better.  

      Even though the FDA itself lists 92 known side effects of aspartame ingestion, it's still on the market today.  

     Sweet Misery A Poisoned World (found here) is an EXCELLENT, must-see, documentary about aspartame. It provides an in-depth look into many aspects of Aspartame, starting from its very beginnings.  Many experts, such as Drs., Specialists and Attorneys as well as a former FDA Investigator are interviewed.  Each one of them gives an amazing, many times shocking, account of all that went into getting Aspartame approved and on the market. It's quite disturbing actually.  There's also interviews with aspartame victims and what they went through.  Together, they all uncover so much and it was a real, eye-opener for me.  

      Yes, it was an expensive lesson for me to learn and it is my hope to keep as many people as possible from going through it too. 

                        Balance.....despite the chaos!
      

       With a diagnosis and plan to help me move forward in hand, I wondered -- Is there anything further I can do??

      The internet was an invaluable resource both for info and for connecting with others who dealt with the same conditions..   (For those of you newly diagnosed, I would suggest joining some of the online support groups, talk to fellow sufferers for ideas, suggestions etc., what has worked for them and what has not.  It's a great place to start and they usually have great suggestions.)

       It was in one such group, I was directed to the work of Dr. Sarah Myhill.  She is a Physician in the UK and has been treating people with ME, since the 1980s.

         I promptly visited her site and started to read, soaking it up as I went.

       From the beginning sentence, it was evident she knows ME and knows it extremely well.  There was a plethora of info, which took some getting through (especially with the brain fog in full force), but everything she'd written strongly resonated with me.  

       I eagerly made notes as I came upon things particularly on point with me (ie one of my symptoms).  I recorded her suggestion, whether that was a nutrient, a vitamin or other recommendation.  I plodded along, bit by bit, note by note, until I got through it all.  I marked the sections which were particularly relevant to me as I knew I'd want to return to read it over again. 
​
      Once through it all, I was armed with a list of  nutrients I was most likely deficient in.  I prefer to get as many nutrients from foods, rather than pills if possible because I've always had a sensitivity to pills (even vitamins). Once an issue happens (ie hives), that's it.... I'll never be able to take that pill again.  Not ever for those pesky hives will reappear.  For this reason, getting the nutrients and vitamins from food sources is always my first choice.  This is not always possible of course and I do use supplements, but only after exhausting food choices first.   

     From these notes, I once again started researching for the foods highest in those particular nutrients, which I also recorded.  Nutrient by nutrient, vitamin by vitamin, until I had an extensive list full of food sources highest in my missing nutrients. I then checked those foods against the foods the homeopath and naturopath said I could and couldn't have.  When I was done, I was left with a list of nutrients and vitamins I was deficient in, the main symptom(s) that deficiency caused and the foods highest in those nutrients which I was able to have.

      This list served as an invaluable resource for me as I could reference it from particular symptom (eg., if I was having a lot of pain, which nutrients/foods would be best for that).  It continues to this day to be helpful and I refer to it often.

        I must admit, the new way of eating from the homeopath and naturopath was challenging enough.  However, trying to incorporate these things on top of it all, made it extremely challenging.  Many of these foods I did not care for, which made the challenge seem almost impossible.

     For the vitamins not available to me in the form of food, I resorted to supplements.  I used only one at a time for a few weeks before adding in another one.  This allowed me to tell if it was actually working, how well it was working and if I could tolerate it without any side effects.  Nothing worse than taking a few (or even two) supplements and not knowing which one is working or which one is causing the hives.   When I was satisfied it was ok, I'd add in the next one and continue on down the line.

       It could have been overwhelming, but as I was learning, baby steps, one at a time and not beating myself up for failures, was the only way to go.

      Little by little, I learned to add in more of these things.  I learned how to cover two, three or four symptoms and use as many foods all in one meal.   It was a real bonus when one food would cover several issues, especially if it was a food I wasn't particularly fond of.  It was a sharp learning curve at first, but one I was determined to stick with.

       As I continued to incorporate these, I noticed, even further improvements.  Still not cured, but well on my way to feeling much better.

        Moving forward in order to keep the...

                        Balance.....despite the Chaos

(nb I am really anxious to get to the post about Aspartame, the dangers of it and other artificial sweeteners as I feel it was one of the biggest contributors to my health issues. I will be happy if I can prevent one person from becoming sick from it.  I wish someone had taken the time to warn me, before I got sick.  However, in the name of keeping things organized here, I will finish my post on the importance of proper nutrition.)

    Immediately after being diagnosed, I visited the only person I knew in real life who had the same illness.  We talked a lot about what had worked and not worked for her. Many things under the "had worked" category involved alternative methods and practitioners, namely a homeopath and naturopath.

     I must admit, I was more than a bit skeptical (ask most Doctors and they'll tell you these guys are a waste of money), but figured I'd exhausted all traditional routes (the specialist had told me this much), so what did I have to lose?   I might as well give it a try and if I didn't notice immediate improvement in some area or on some level, I could (and would) stop going before I spent a small fortune.

       I visited the homeopath and she referred me to a naturopath.  The two of them worked together in order to get my issues straightened out.  One of the biggest areas they felt, were my nutritional requirements.

      I had live blood analysis done and was once again shocked at what they could see -- things I had not told them (because I didn't feel it was important and because after years of trying to get help from mainstream medicine with no success, I had given up telling any of them.  No amount of explanation ever worked, nobody ever got it so I decided I would never mention it again.)  The appointments that followed, were not rushed.  There was a lot of time for me to talk and explain in detail, all of my issues.  My words, together with the live blood analysis results and their determinations, enabled them to put together a treatment plan for me.
     
      This plan included:

• discovering which nutrients I was deficient in
• uncovering other issues, such as my body not absorbing nutrients properly
• implmenting a nutritional plan
• implementing a supplement plan 

        They felt the most important issued to address was the absorbing issue (or should I say non absorbing issue).  The naturopath explained to me exactly what was going on with my body and as she spoke,  described exactly how it felt to me.  So much so, it was almost eerie - like she was actually experiencing it herself.   (This was the thing I mentioned above, the thing I had decided to never mention to another Dr.  Not only did she get it, in explicit, accurate detail, she did so from absolutely no explanation from me!  Did I mention it felt, eerie?).  

     Cautiously, I implemented their first suggestion and immediately, I noticed an improvement.  Not cured, but, but a noticeable marked improvement.  Baby steps forward, but at least it was forward.

       Another area they worked on me was with diet.  Can you say complete overhaul??

• Pasta had to go! (noooo....loved pasta -- it was my all-time fave!)
• Milk had to go! (again...Nooo... loved loved loved Milk)
• All things white (flour, pasta, potatoes, bread...everything white had to go)
• Sugar had to go (couldn't even begin to process this one)
• Artificial sweeteners had to go (had already implemented this one -- one thing already crossed off the list. Yay me!  )
• All processed food had to go
• Coffee had to go (Nooo...not coffee too :( )
• Fruit juice had to go (I was ok with this, not really a fruit juice drinker)

      Man, it was feeling like there was nothing left to eat.  

       I suggested she go over the things that were ok and the list looked something like this:

• all the green leafy vegetables I wanted
• all vegetables except corn
• fruits
• water, lots of high quality water
• lean meats such as beef, chicken, turkey
• sprouted grain bread
• sesame seeds
• pumpkin seeds
• coconut or olive oil
• pasta made from Kamut flour (tried it.  Blech! 'Nuff said)

     It didn't look like an over abundant list to me and one that was going to take a lot to get used of.  It would be learning to eat and cook, all over again. All my staples were gone, nothing familiar left and every single meal was going to be a challenge.

       I wanted my health to improve though and thus was willing to do whatever it took.   I reminded myself, I didn't have to stick with it, if I found it didn't work or show some improvement.

      On board I jumped and noticed immediately, improvements.  

     Who knew?  Not me, that's for sure.  Not what I expected but results I couldn't ignore.  
  
             Onward and upward in order to keep...

                         Balance....despite the Chaos!

                         (up next:  What else can I do?)

     Proper Nutrition is an extremely important factor on the road to improved health and well-being and therefore much too large to properly cover its many aspects in just one post. Therefore, it will be discussed over a series of posts. This is part one.

    Before I became ill, I thought my diet was very healthy.  I mean, there's always room for improvement, no matter what, but I felt for the most part it was healthy.  I liked junk food (helllloooo chocolate!!), but only as an "extra" in moderation.  I was active, in good health, had a lot of energy and therefore comfortable with the way I ate.  

    My mornings started with a couple cups of coffee.  Double double as we say (two cream, two teaspoons of sugar) and I had two cups.  For several years, I used artificial sweeteners (aspartame) instead of sugar, you know, because sugar isn't good for us and these alternatives are a healthy substitution (or so we are told).  

     Artificial sweeteners, however,  proved to be a colossal mistake (more on this in a moment).

      That was my breakfast.  No food, just coffee.

      Lunch was lunch -- usually a sandwich of some sort and a glass of milk.

      Dinner consisted of lots of pasta (loved pasta!!).  Not only did I love pasta, but I was trying to incorporate meatless meals into my diet.  After all, meat we were/are told is taboo, so this was a win-win situation for me.  My much-loved pasta, a healthy alternative, meatless meal.  

     Other nights, it would be meat and vegetables or something frozen which only required heating.  Here as well, I opted for the "healthy" foods too like frozen chicken fingers, frozen dinners etc.  (spoiler alert: I was wrong!)

     My beverage of choice, every night, was two to three large glasses of milk (after all, milk is healthy...those commercials on tv tell us so).  I'd been a life-long milk drinker and had always drank a lot of it.

     I very rarely had desserts.  They were reserved for special occasions only.  I was contributing to my healthy eating by avoiding regular desserts.  

     Supper was followed by another couple of cups of coffee, double double again and when I was using sweeteners, it was 4 - 6 tablets, depending on the size and strength of the cup of coffee.    Sometimes later on in the evening or on the weekend, my husband and I would enjoy a coffee or two (always double double) at the local coffee shop.

     I didn't regularly consume potoato chips, or sugary snack foods (again only on a rare occasions).  

     I honestly felt this was a healthy approach.       

       Yay me!      

     Enter chronic, debilitating, illness.  All over pain, brain fog, fatigue, weakness -- all of them extreme.  In addition, there was a lot of weight gain and a terrible chest cold with excessive cough, one I could not shake for several months. The list of symptoms was endless.

        As I've written elsewhere in this blog about what I went through trying to get diagnosed, I won't write about it again.  However, when I finally was diagnosed, the Dr. told me nothing further could be done and basically, this was the new me.  

     My stubbornness served me well here as I refused to accept this as fact.  I had young children to care for, a whole life ahead of me and needed to improve to be the best version of me I could possibly be.

    This put me on a quest to search out information on my condition. I was hungry for information, any information that would help me improve. Unfortunately, at this point, I was too brain-fogged to do much of anything let alone retain information I'd read.  Thankfully, my first discovery, which was the dangers of aspartame and other artificial sweeteners, did not require much effort to uncover. 

     There it was, in black and white, the dangers and side effects of them.  Article after article, all listing the same things with wide-spread pain being one of them.  

      Immediately,  I stopped putting aspartame in my coffee and was shocked at the immediate decrease of pain.  It wasn't completely gone, but a very palpable difference.  (I will go into a lot more detail about Aspartame and artificial sweeteners in a separate, future blog post and will link here when it is up.  Aspartame is such a large topic and deserves its own post).  

     This improvement, spurred me on to see what else I could uncover and implement, all in the name of improving my health.  With each step of improvement, no matter how small, came an increase in the amount of info I could retain and implement.  In the beginning, the steps were small but an improvement nonetheless.  

      Stay tuned for part 2 of this series!

        Until then, remember to strive for

                         Balance....despite the chaos!
        

     Nothing says serenity quite like the gentle ocean waves washing over the last bit of slushy iceberg. Even better when it's centre stage, illuminated in the soft glow of morning sun as it rises up over the ocean's edge, beginning it's daily journey.

     A new day is dawning.

     These things together with the salt air and the peacefulness of the early morning give vivid definition to serenity.  ​

      (This is previously posted here on the serenity page of my blog, but bears repeating as it's been *that* kind of day.  )

            Refusing to give up so I can have, 

                                  Balance....despite the chaos!
           

​    
                                     Yes!  It can be done!  

     Not only can it be done, it may be easier than putting them back into school.  Now, each case is different for sure and putting them back into school may be the best option for your situation.   Only you truly know your situation and what is best for you.  For us however, continuing to homeschool was the best and easier route to go.  

     We'd been on our homeschooling journey for five years when I became ill.  It was frustrating for this once energetic homeschool mom.  I did not know what was wrong with me, just that something was terribly wrong.  Initially, I slept a lot (as in 'fifteen to twenty hours per day, every day' slept a lot).  

     I was so weak.  

     The brain fog was immense.  

     I was a mess.  

     We had just moved to a new community and therefore had no family or friends to help out.  Not only did our church not help, they raked me over the coals for (in their opinion) not being a good enough mom.  It was my husband, myself and our three kids.

     The hours I was awake were spent going from Dr. to Specialist to test, without any answers.  It was unsettling and upsetting.  Beside my over extended sleeping, my overwhelming weakness, my pea-soup-thick brain fog, my many Dr. visits, I still had a house to and a family to look after.  Cooking meals, doing laundry, taking care of them was enough, but in addition to that, there was the homeschooling.

      At first glance, it was, what many would deem, our worst year of homeschooling.  After all, we had only completed half of our year's work.  I must admit, these were my initial thoughts as well.  The fact we weren't covering the amounts of book work we had others years, was extremely upsetting to me.  After all, every year at the beginning of of the year, I'd make a plan.  I knew how many pages each child needed to do in each subject, every day and we always stuck to it.  That was, until chronic illness came to visit.  We just kept getting further and further behind.

          *Sigh*

     I wish I knew then what I know now but hindsight is 20/20 and you learn as you go.  When you're too sick to do ____________(whatever is on your list), you're too sick!  There's no amount of anything that will magically make it happen.  It just doesn't.

      After I came to the place of acceptance of our situation (acceptance of situation is an ongoing process), I was able to re-frame how I looked at the whole situation.  I was having difficulty doing even the most basic of tasks and so out of necessity, had to involve the kids.  They aided in (sometimes took completely over) a lot of the cooking, the clean up and the laundry.  They were able to help out with all the other household stuff too, like cleaning.  (Thankfully, I was able to supervise a lot of this from my bed!).   It wasn't too long before I came to the important realization, I wasn't a failure, but they were learning life skills.  Valuable life skills they'd need in their future.  

      They may have only covered half of their book work, but gained a lot of practical skills and knowledge in many other areas.  Looking back, I see even more benefit in the "other" and "extra" things they learned that year!  

       During that time, I was quite often asked about putting the kids back into school.  On the surface, it may seem like sending them off to school each day is a lot easier than having them around all day.  For us however, that was just an illusion.  

     My answer to those naysayers, was always a resounding NO.  I knew how much more stress would be added to our day if we had to have the kids up at a certain time, lunches made by a certain time, out the door by a certain time and then all the extras that come along with going to school.  Things like homework that *has* to be done on a certain night.  Extra curricular activities that require a lot of effort on the parent's part.  The list goes on and on.  Before we homeschooled, we'd had our kids in school and found it very daunting -- and that's when we were healthy.  I just can't imagine trying to keep up with all of that when I was so ill.   With homeschooling, we could set our own schedule and if the work didn't get done today, there was always tomorrow.  No pressure whatsoever.

     Again, as I mentioned at the beginning, this what was right for us.  Obviously, we're all different with different situations and sometimes, sending them back to school may be the best option.

      For those who do choose homeschooling while chronically ill, my tips would be:

• Don't sweat the small stuff.  If it doesn't get done today, there is always tomorrow  
• Putting them back into school is quite often NOT easier (because of all the extra work and expectations that get put on to families)
• Simplify as much as possible (your homeschooling routine, your daily routine.  Simplify everything!)
• Look for ways to conserve your energy.  When I was at my sickest point, I did a lot of homeschooling from my bed.  They'd sit on the bed beside me and we'd read together and then go over the lessons.  We even set up a desk in the corner of our bedroom so the youngest could work there.  That way, he was close enough to ask questions if they should arise and I was able to keep an eye on him to make sure he was always working. *wink* 
• Learning to do school work on their own encourages independent learning which will be of huge benefit to them in college or university 
• If you are fortunate enough to have family and/or friend support around you, take advantage of this.  Having a meal brought in or the kids taken out for a few hours can do wonders for everyone.  (If not though, it can be done solo. We did not have any outside support, so had to do it all ourselves.)
• Helping around the house, whether it's meal preparation, cleaning, answering phone calls, making a grocery list or taking care of the ill person *IS* also learning.  It's not book work, but it is important life skills and real life.  What better way to learn about than by doing it?! 
• If the children are old enough, meal planning can be incorporated into the learning day (and this can also be done from bed!)
• Prepare larger batches of meals.  Have one portion today and freeze the other for a day when energies (and nerves!) are running low.
• Remove or distance yourself from toxic people and toxic relationships.  If all they can do is rake you over the coals for the things you aren't able to do, you are better off away from them..
• and finally, don't sweat the small stuff (did I say that already??!?  It bears repeating...)  It is what it is and no amount of being upset because the work didn't get done, will actually make the work get done.  No.  In fact, it will make things worse.  It will make you feel worse (which is exactly what you don't need...you are already sick enough!) and then everything else will spiral downward as well.               

                                           You've got this!!

​                                      Balance....despite the Chaos!!

​
Don't do it!

 
    In the name of moving forward, don't do it!   


     Easier said than done, I know!



   However, that being said,  don't get caught up in "The Blame Game". 


 
    When things go wrong or have gone wrong, the tendency is to play "The Blame Game".


 
       That list of people we blame for our situation can--- and  quite often does-- include everyone from the mailman to ourselves and everyone in between.   Recently, I've even seen a certain Hollywood Celebrity blaming a certain politician for making her gain weight! OK then!!!  

​                  The should-haves / could haves / would haves/ if onlys ....

        It's a case of being caught on that proverbial, never-ending wheel.  Round and round it goes.  No beginning, no end, no way to get off.  

     Enter the blame game as we identify all kinds of things which have gone wrong and put us where we are.  

        Thoughts such as (but not limited to):

•       My parents should have done things differently......
•       The church should have reached out to me.....
•       I should have gotten that promotion.....
•       People should have helped me out more.....
•       If only I went to a different school.....
•       I should have done it this way.... 
•       The politician made me gain weight 

                               On and on it goes....

       and we become stuck on that wheel with no idea how to get off.  It's not that we don't want to get off, to move forward, because we do.  We just have no idea how to.

       Sound familiar?  I know it does for me.  

     Now, these reasons may very well be true (all except for the politician causing the celebrity to gain weight.  I still can't get over that one lol).  

     We shouldn't deny these things were done to us.  We shouldn't minimize their effect on us.  On the contrary.  It's important for us to acknowledge these things,  the wrongs that were done to us and the emotions that followed.  

     However, it's equally as important, if not more important to move forward beyond them. Forward we must go.   After all, getting stuck in the continual rut of these hurts, provides absolutely no benefit to us and in fact pulls us down causing further decline.    Yes, they were hurtful.  Yes, I worked so hard and should have gotten that promotion.  Yes, the church should have least called to see how I was.  Yes, all these things are absolutely true, however, dwelling on them:

• does not change the past
• does not undo those things
• does not improve my situation
• does not help me when I am sick
• does not make my load any lighter or easier to carry.
• does not cause the people who hurt me, to be sorry or concerned they caused the hurt in the first place (they still don't care!!)

  
    It makes it worse by upsetting us all over again (can you say round two?).  By continuing to let it bother us, it lets them win even further.  It lets them steal our joy and it wastes our energy  (energy which could be better used on moving forward.)

     We need to take responsibility for ourselves.  We need to turn our negatives into positives.  That first step forward is usually the hardest, no matter how small it is, but necessary.  

      The how we do this, looks different for everyone.  Perhaps we need to take a step back from the friendship, group or relationship until we can work through it.  Perhaps we need to put some boundaries in place.  Perhaps we can help others who were in our situation -- knowing how it felt to be there and not wanting others to have to experience what we did.  Perhaps we can see the non-promotion is a sign it's time to look for a new job (who knows, a better position may be on our doorstep and without the knock of not getting the promotion, we'd never had the inkling to even look).

      Whatever our situation is, while it is not be the situation of choice, we must learn to move forward through it!  

      What are some ways you've found helpful in this endeavour?  

     Moving forward to keep the 

                              Balance....despite the chaos!!